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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25377619">Desert Flower</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/hernamewasalice/pseuds/hernamewasalice'>hernamewasalice</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - Dark, Dark, Domestic Fluff, Dysfunctional Family, Dysfunctional Relationships, Emperor Kylo Ren, F/M, Fucked Up, Married Life, Older Man/Younger Woman, Rey is in the dark, Secret Identity, Secrets</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 10:42:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,217</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25377619</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/hernamewasalice/pseuds/hernamewasalice</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Rey doesn't know who her husband is and Emperor Kylo Ren plans to keep it that way.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>166</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>367</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The Every Day Man</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Ben is in his 30s, and Rey is 21.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Nobody knows that Emperor Kylo Ren was married.</p><p>No one. Not his followers. Not his acquaintances. Not even his own relatives. They don't know that he had children - two in fact, with another one on the way. Everyone wanted to kill him and the last thing he wanted was for anyone to go after his family. It was safer that his wife and children were kept a secret. The emperor had many enemies and so he kept them hidden in plain sight. His children can grow up normally and his wife can enjoy life without the burdens of the galaxy.</p><p>When his children are old enough, he will teach them and prepare them for the throne. For now, they were only young and he wants them to have a childhood. Kylo never had a childhood and he swore to himself he would never take that away from his children. He plans on living for a long time and their training can begin much later.</p><p>No one knows that Emperor Kylo Ren was married with children, not even his wife.</p><hr/><p>
  <em>Kylo thought about it for a long time, about the woman he wanted to bear his children. He wanted a nobody. A woman with no title - no ties - no role in society - but a woman of her own worth and independence. He wanted a wife who was loving and faithful but was also strong and able to take care of herself when he was away. Kylo had always been a logical man as he was calculative.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He began searching when he entered his thirties. The emperor was established then and it was time for him to find a wife. He specifically chose to look in small isolated planets, the more rundown, the better. The emperor will give his children everything but also give them modesty and humbleness - something he never got. Kylo grew up lavishly and had to learn those traits after years of being spoiled and arrogant. His children will have such a better life than him. They will have a caring mother and a father - despite being gone periodically for work, will still be a part in their lives.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>No he wasn't going to be like his father who left for adventures and glory. Kylo will come back more frequently to his family despite ruling the galaxy.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He thinks about this as he scoured the outdoor market and settled his eyes on a thin scavenger. </em>
</p><hr/><p>
  <em>There was something about the girl. There was so much loneliness in her that felt familiar to his. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>She was a pretty thing but she was extremely emaciated. Her clothes hung loosely on her petite frame and her collarbone and jawline was prominent. Kylo's consumed with the desire to plant his seed in her to fill her to her frame. He's came across to several beautiful women all over the galaxy but none has caught his eye the way she did. The girl was beautiful. She's quiet and distant - but he can tell she was aching for someone to connect to.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He can be that person to her.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Kylo kept his distance as he followed the scavenger.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She would be a good lover to him. He can feel how much she needed love and intimacy. It was in the same intensity that he needed. Kylo can have sex from any woman he wanted but genuine love wasn't something he could get. But he can receive and exchange it with her. Despite how jagged and closed off her façade was, he saw how emotionally available she was. He learned so much about her by how she carried herself - a woman of deep pain and fear of abandonment. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>She wouldn't leave him even when things went bad.</em>
</p><hr/><p>Rey spends the whole afternoon preparing for her husband's return. She cleaned their home extensively and went to the market to buy the freshest of produce for dinner. Ben was only home for one week of the month and she makes sure to make it special because it was. She adored her husband who worked so hard for their growing family. He does a variety of laborious odd jobs and she appreciated him for risking his well being for their children. He often came back with new scars and injuries but he never says a word. And neither did Rey.</p><p>She admired her husband. He was a brave and hard working man and because of him, they are able to live comfortably in Jakku. Food was scarce in this planet and fresh food was a luxury. She never imagined she would be able to have nondehydrated food, let alone have a family of her own.</p><p>The stew has been cooking for nearly the entire day. She does this to make the meat extra tender and for the flavors to be more pronounced. She cuts up some bread while Brenna and Bennet were playing with their toys. Rey hums as she makes a dipping sauce for the shellfish she bought. She decided to buy two pounds of shellfish today for it was Ben's favorite.</p><p>She hums louder, trying to distract herself from the smell of shellfish. She liked shellfish but she was two and a half months pregnant and sensitive to certain foods. She could barely stand the smell of her own breastmilk but had no choice since Bennet still needed her milk. Rey couldn't deny that being pregnant while having little ones was difficult but Ben and her wanted their children to all be close in age.</p><p>When Rey finished setting the food on the table, she puts her hair down and puts on a pretty lightweight dress. Usually Rey wore trousers and wraps for she moved around a lot tending to her baby and toddler but on nights where her husband returned was special. Brenna cooed as she saw the waves in her mother's hair. Rey puts her hair half up and adds some color to her cheeks.</p><p>She dresses her children up too. She puts Brenna's hair in intricate braids. This fascinated Brenna that she plays with her hair while Rey breastfed Bennet. Rey has a strong connection with her husband. She can always sense his presence before he entered the home. She remained still, trying to contain her excitement. She couldn't exactly run to her husband with her baby latched on to her breast.</p><p>"Daddy!" Brenna squealed. She jets then for her father, hair swaying and all.</p><p>Ben laughs and scoops her into his arms. "How's my little girl?"</p><p>"Good! Mommy got me a new dress."</p><p>"I see. It's very pretty." Ben goes to Rey with Brenna in his hold. "Hello sweetheart," he kisses Rey and then Bennet. He examines Bennet and then gently pulls down the neckline of her dress to inspect her breasts. "Are you eating enough?" he asked her.</p><p>"I am," Rey said earnestly.</p><p>Ben bit his lip. He knows his wife, knows about her life before. She's struggled to survive and that mentality is still within her. He knows that when he's gone, she saves things even though she doesn't have to. She makes sure their children were well but she barely feeds herself. "Rey, I already told you. I make more than enough for us and the money's going to keep coming. It's not going anywhere. You don't have to worry."</p><p>"Yes but we don't know that - what if something happens to you at work? What if you get really injured and then -"</p><p>He chuckled softly. "Nothing's going to happen to me."</p><p>It amazes Rey, how positive he was. He always brushes everything off. Nothing ever seemed to worry him. That's what she loves about him. He was level headed and grounded. He was stable and reliable. She never thought she would ever find someone like him. He was the only one in her life that came back for her and he proves this every month.</p><p>"Besides if you don't eat enough, you're going to have trouble producing enough milk for Bennet. And you're also pregnant," Ben gently reminded her. "This doesn't just affect you but our family. Rey, I know you've been through a lot before me but things are different. I'm here and there's nothing for you to be afraid of."</p><p>She nodded quickly, feeling her anxiety disappear. She switched Bennet to her other breast as she kissed Ben. She loved Ben and how calm he was. Not only does he listen to her, he validates her feelings. Once Bennet was done, Ben takes him in his arms as well. Rey adjusted her clothes and curled beside him.</p><p>"I love you," he presses another kiss.</p><p>Her heart skips a beat, just like the first time. "I love you too."</p><hr/><p>Their children like sleeping with them but it makes it difficult for Rey and Ben to be intimate. They love their children but they want to bond after being apart. They wait until their children are asleep before being intimate. It's hard with their home being so small. Sound travels easily.</p><p>Ben lays her on the ground. It's the only place that they're able to go with intensity without making any loud sounds. They have to make minimal noises for their children were both light sleepers. Ben caresses his wife and kisses her softly as he pelvis kept bucking into her. He's already excited to start but he wants to take things slow. Her breasts were exposed from feeding Bennet a few moments ago. Her breasts are tender and sensitive and so Ben massages them. It doesn't take long for him to start teasing her nipples.</p><p>She winces and bites down on her lip to stay quiet. She wants to sleep with her husband and so she can't wake their children up.</p><p>"You have to eat more," her husband tells her. He tugs at her nipple, applying pressure. "He's already sucking you dry," Ben chuckled. "And he's only going to get bigger." Milk trickles down. Ben bends down to lick the milk off her skin. "I wish I was here more to take care of you." He nips at her skin, leaving a trail of kisses as he made his way down. "Be quiet, okay? Don't want to wake up the kids."</p><p>She always makes noise whenever he pleasures her there. He doesn't do it often for that reason. "Ben -</p><p>Her husband hushes her. "I want to. It's been a while. Sometimes I miss when it was just us and we can be loud as we want. I miss hearing your lovely voice." He fingers her then slowly. Everything about him was massive, his fingers parts her folds without much intrusion. Rey felt the pressure building within her - the warm sensation creeping across her body. She tries to ease the pain by curling her toes and hands but all she could think about was moaning.</p><p>It feels more than good - he's paying extra attention to her clit. He's not at all rough and touches her in waves. Soft and faint to rough and powerful. Her legs twitched as her entire body trembled. Quietly she pants into the air. She shifts back ever so often to control the sensations - to give herself a second to breathe and gather herself from screaming. A part of her regrets it every time she did move for she was so close to coming. So good. So good. "Oh my Ben - Ben -</p><p>He's licking her now, in slow swirls. His lips are touching her, nibbling on her bundle of nerves lightly.</p><p>Rey pressed her thighs together, desperately trying to numb the feeling. Her heart was beating rapidly and she's panting, muffling her cries. He picks up the pace then, touching her in zig zag motions as he blew cool air. She can feel herself quivering there.<em> Don't yell. Don't yell. You don't want to wake up them up</em>, she reminded herself.</p><p>Ben stops right before she was about to climax and climbs on top of her, pinning her by her wrists as he pushes himself inside. He curses into her hair as he began thrusting inside of her. "I forget how tight you are," he mumbled, biting her throat. "Two children and yet you're so tight."</p><p>"You're a big man and I'm very small."</p><p>He nodded frantically as he kept going despite feeling her milk leaking on to his chest.</p><hr/><p>Rey only discovers new marks on him after they have sex the night he returns. Every time. Their minds are so clouded with lust and desire to have sex that Rey doesn't notice any new changes to him until afterwards. They liked cuddling naked after they were intimate. She's able to find the changes then, when all the lands of flesh was laid out before her. He has a new one, across his chest and one on his shoulder blade. She traces her fingertips along the bumps and ridges. "What's this?" she asked. It looked fascinating to her. The wound didn't look like anything she's ever seen. It doesn't look like he got it from machinery or from falling. It looked like he was attacked.</p><p>Ben shrugs. "It's just a scrape. It will heal, sweetheart." He gives her a smile as he tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear.</p><p>She breathed deeply as she lowered herself to rest on his shoulder. "I don't like seeing you hurt." She lifts her head up, eyes large and hopeful. "You don't have to keep working like this. You can perhaps get a job locally, maybe I can too." They've been discussing about moving to a bigger home on a different planet for some time now. They had more than enough saved up but it was the only the matter of location. "We can maybe be farmers - wouldn't that be nice? Brenna and Bennet would love being in a lush green planet with animals."</p><p>He kisses her nose. "I make more money doing odd jobs than being a farmer."</p><p>Her skin tightened. She can sense he was brushing the idea off again. Yes he was here for a week out of every month but it was never a set week. Rey hated wondering when he'll come back. She hates waiting for a message from him. It's not a way to live, waiting for someone to come back. She's don't that for so many years of her life and she doesn't want to do that anymore. "Yes but maybe if we both be farmers together we can make it by and then you don't have to go away. It's much safer too."</p><p>"I'm happy doing odd jobs, Rey. I earn a lot, way more than any local job. We can still move to a wooded area that has more of a population for Brenna and Bennet."</p><p>"Sometimes I feel like you want to be away from your family," Rey snapped as she covered herself more with the blanket. She doesn't hide her anger or the old wounds of rejection she carried within her. She loves him but hates how much he was gone. She spent so much of her life waiting for her parents to come back but they never did. She was afraid that he was going to do the same thing one day.</p><p>"Rey you know that's not true. I love you and our kids very much. I have to be away because it's for the best for our family." He pulls her to him. She shakes her head stubbornly.</p><p>"No."</p><p>"Rey."</p><p>She doesn't answer.</p><p>Ben sighed but proceeds to annoy her. He kisses her then, leaving wet marks on purpose to elicit a giggle. It doesn't take long for her to abandon her animosity. Her husband was only here for only one week of the month and she doesn't want to fight. They're kissing now, his hands are on her waist and holding her firmly in place. "I'm never going to leave you," he whispered as he kissed her neck.</p><p>She panted softly. "Promise?"</p><p>"Promise."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. The Ordinary Family</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>writing this fic reminds me of the days I used to write "Nobody Knows." The tone in this is similar to me &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Her husband doesn't like talking about politics.</p><p>Not a lot people do. The galaxy has been in more at war than peace and everyday civilians are just trying to survive. This wasn't out of the ordinary. Rey herself didn't like talking about the war either but sometimes, the news upset her. The Emperor was a ruthless man, having countless innocent civilians murdered. Sometimes, Rey voices her opinion and vents out her frustration to him. Her husband will always change the subject and she allowed it for he was rarely here and he wanted to enjoy every second.</p><p>Rey does not blame her husband.</p><p>For whatever happens in politics, they will remain the same. She a scavenger and mother and him, a low skill worker and father. They were ordinary. No one. Whoever is in power won't effect their low status in society. Rey counted her blessings for this. She doesn't have to worry about her family's safety. They were simple people.</p><p>They slept in this morning, all in one bed. Brenna was young and wasn't able to comprehend things so Rey and Ben remained naked in bed after last night's activity. They were all covered in a blanket and Brenna was used to seeing her mother naked from the waist up to feed Bennet. Rey's feeding Bennet right now while being cuddled by her daughter and husband.</p><p>"We got to get the younglings their own bed," her husband chuckled. "It's getting far too cramped. I can't imagine how this bed will support another child."</p><p>"I know but they are still small," Rey countered. "Brenna is not even two yet and Bennet still needs to be fed every couple of hours."</p><p>Ben kisses her chin. "You spoil them."</p><p>"No I don't!" she giggled as he kissed her ear. She was ticklish there and he knew that. "You just want me all to yourself."</p><p>He flashed her a wicked smile. "I do."</p><p>Brenna giggles and climbs on top of them and settles on laying on her parents' faces.</p>
<hr/><p>Most days, Rey has her children wrapped to her but since her husband was here, he insists on carrying them. She fastens the both of them to Ben. Brenna knows how to walk but she gets tired easily. It amazes her how strong Ben was. He's able to carry the weight of their children in addition to items as if it was nothing. They were going to go to the market today and stop by the trading post to find an object to help repair the roof. Afterwards they were going to go on a walk in the evening and watch the sun set.</p><p>It was a simple day but Rey savored every moment with him. She hates when he leaves.</p><p>"Are you sure you'll be fine?" she asked again. "I can carry -</p><p>"No. You're pregnant Rey. You shouldn't be putting that much strain on your back."</p><p>She couldn't help but to make a face at how ridiculous he was being. She took care of everything by herself when he was gone. And he knows that. She's done it before pregnant and she can do it with her third pregnancy too. "But I feel bad that you have to do most of the lifting and carrying -</p><p>"Whenever I'm home you're not allowed to lift a finger," he reminds her. "You already do so much when I'm not around."</p><p>Rey scrunched up her nose. She knows he means well but she hates it when he smothers her. "I'm fully capable. Besides I have my speeder and other contraptions to carry items around."</p><p>"I'm completely aware sweetheart but when I'm here I want to take care of you and our family."</p><p>Ben touches her stomach and she forgets altogether.</p>
<hr/><p>Sometimes Kylo feels guilty for leaving his wife and children every month. It was for the best though. His children can grow up untainted and in peace. Either way even if they lived with him, they would barely see him. The Emperor certainly didn't want his family to see him when he was agitated. Kylo was not a monster but he was not a patient man. And sometimes, he will admit he can be violent. He supposed his wife would be afraid of him for a while but she'll warm up to him and sit beside his throne.</p><p>He thinks about it, about the convenience of having his family wherever he went. It wouldn't be likely or ideal however. The Emperor constantly traveled making sure everything was in it's place. That wasn't a life he wanted for his children to be dragged and hidden in a ship. Especially when most of the traveling wasn't always peaceful.</p><p>The Resistance has withered away some time ago but he knows there are a few left hiding like rodents and plotting another up rise.</p><p>The Resistance should be scared him, just like the Skywalkers.</p><p>Kylo adjusted his tan colored civilian clothes as he scanned the market for any discrepancies. His children were enjoying the scenery while he searched for any spies. His wife is walking a few feet ahead of them, gathering vegetables and herbs for supper. She was holding her staff and humming, oblivious to her surroundings.</p><p>His family were safe here but he remains cautious. The people here were nothing but spineless rats willing to turn on someone for scraps. That was the one thing he despised about leaving his family on their own. His wife while she was street smart, she was still a pregnant woman with two children. The civilians here knew very well that he wasn't always around and he fears that one day one of the rats will take advantage of his desert flower.</p><p>She may be a fighter but she's vulnerable when she's pregnant. They have a nice home but it wasn't up to par to the base. There was no security system, no solid structure. Anyone can break in with their home being composed of found material. The Emperor stays awake at night thinking about that - that at any moment someone can break in and rob and attack his family. Sometimes he thinks about hiring private guards to watch his family. He'll order them to keep a distance so his wife doesn't know.</p><p>He lingers behind his wife, discretely glaring at every scum they passed to remind them their place.</p><p>"Is everything alright?" Rey stopped and turned her head at him. "Are you getting tired?" she frowned. Sweet Rey, sweet innocent Rey. She's more concerned that he's worn out from the heat and carrying everything than her own well being. She's still a tiny thing even after two births.</p><p>Kylo smiled at her. "I'm fine, just the children want to look around."</p>
<hr/><p>When night comes, he puts Brenna and Bennet to bed. He has Rey relax while he read to their children. He uses an assortment of voices and facial expressions to captivate their interest. It doesn't take long to put them to sleep when he does it for his children knew well they couldn't get away with many things with him. The Emperor was a kind man but firm when he has to be.</p><p>He and his wife really should get the children beds of their own but it makes sense to once they find a better place to live. He and Rey haven't agreed on where yet but they really need to decide soon. He can't even bring gifts anymore with how cramped their home is. Kylo has Rey sit as he made her some tea. She's only a few months pregnant and suffering from morning sickness. She's such an adorable thing, she tries to be secretive about every time she vomits but he knows. She doesn't want to be a burden but she wasn't. No matter how many times Kylo reminds her, she doesn't listen.</p><p>She's been through a lot and it's still hard for her to let someone take care of her.</p><p>He pours the leftover hot water in a wooden bowl and dips some cloth into it. He puts it on a tray along with tea and some sweets. "How are you feeling?"</p><p>"I'm fine."</p><p>Kylo smirked. "I see."</p><p>She sits up then, noticing the sweets on the tray. "I told you not to buy these. We really don't need them."</p><p>"I know they are your favorite," he said calmly. He placed the damp cloth on her forehead. "You deserve nothing but the best." The Emperor means it, every single word. She was his beautiful desert flower and it tore him apart for subjecting her to continue living like this. He's aware that Jakku was her home but she was above this miserable place.</p><p>"Thank you Ben but this is expensive. I really don't need it."</p><p>"Yes you do. You take care of our family all on your own. You deserve the finest things in life."</p><p>"Ben -</p><p>"Rey," he said firmly.</p><p>She complies then. She leans in to kiss him, just like a good girl she was. He holds her in his arms, rubbing her back - at the strain from carrying a baby in her belly and their children. Rey sighs in relief. "Thank you but you have to share with me. I can't possibly eat this all on my own." She hands him some of the sweets. Kylo chuckled in endearment at his little wife. She's younger than him and sometimes it's transparent by her mannerisms.</p><p>"Afterwards I'll give you a massage," he says as he fed her.</p><p>"I really don't deserve you."</p><p>He shakes his head at her. "I really don't deserve you."</p>
<hr/><p>Kylo makes love to his wife later that night. He misses hearing her screams and so he takes her to his ship. They have to find a place soon. He helps her into her clothes. After they have sex, they were immediately getting dressed to get back into their home with their sleeping children. He admits it's irresponsible of them to leave their children alone but the ship was close by. Just several feet away.</p><p>He was an attentive father while fucking his wife, listening intently for any sound coming from their home.</p><p>"Are you nice and full?" he asked her as he touched her stomach and pussy. His spend is dripping on her thigh. Kylo couldn't help but to admire seeing his come on her milky flesh and her. She loves him and craves to be in bed with him. He doesn't have to use his title to convince her. She wanted him as much as he wanted her. She was the only person who wasn't afraid of him. There were a few women he considered in taking in as his wife but he lost interest whenever he sensed the women were frightened by him.</p><p>"More than full," she said shyly. She helps him into his own clothes as well.</p><p>As he dresses her, Kylo imagines how she would look in form fitting clothes. She would look beautiful in something dark, low cut, and silky but he knows her. She would be too embarrassed to wear it and question the practically of it. But maybe she will wear it because she wants to please him. He would certainly be pleased. He loved his desert flower.</p><p>She looks around the ship in curiosity. "This is a new ship," she gathered. "What happened to the old one?"</p><p>The Emperor smiled at his wife. "I traded it," he said casually.</p><p>"What was wrong with the old one?" she raised her eyebrow at him.</p><p>It got damaged, but he won't tell her that. She doesn't know that he switches several ships to see her. She doesn't know that his real ship was hidden a few planets away. "Nothing. I did some work for a trading post and the main seller was grateful and offered this one in return. It's nice, no?"</p><p>Rey nodded, her shoulders lowering. "It certainly is nice." She looked around the ship again. The ship wasn't extravagant but it was evident that the new ship costed more than his old one. It was more spacious and up to date. "Are you sure you're not a smuggler by any chance?" she said cheekily.</p><p>He laughs in amusement. If only his wife knew of his background. "Do you actually think so lowly of your husband?"</p><p>"You know I don't. I'm only teasing."</p><p>The Emperor puts his arm around his wife and kisses her again. "How about tomorrow we go out?" he suggested. Kylo liked to take his children out from this wasteland ever so often. Let his children be in preferable weather. Let his children explore. Have his children be surrounded by <em>culture</em>. "We can go anywhere you want and I'll let you fly the ship too."</p><p>Her eyes lit up. "Can we?"</p><p>"Certainly," he said as he smiled at her.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. A Flower to a Name</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sometimes, the Emperor wonders if his wife would still love their children if she knew who their father really was. She's referred the Emperor as a murderous monster countless times. He wonders if she will sing the same tune about their children. Kylo pushes the thoughts away. Of course his wife wouldn't. His wife loved him and adored their children - but would have she still laid in bed with him if she had known who he truly was?</p><p>He assumes she would but not out of desire but fear. Everyone knows to obey the Emperor and his wife, despite her temper was a woman who will do anything to live. In that situation, Kylo's certain she'll grow to love him once she sees how compassionate he was with their newborn.</p><p>Kylo goes to his children. Rey was asleep and he didn't want her to wake up. She's pregnant and when he's home, he likes to take care of everything.</p><p>The Emperor holds both of his children in his arms and smiles at what to come.</p><hr/><p>Her husband has a sense of humor. It mainly comes out when they are in bed. A rather dark sense of humor. He likes to call Rey his breeding stock. Her husband was a gentle man but things are different when they are in bed as well. He's careful whenever she's heavily pregnant, cautious with her stomach. "Tell me, what are you?" he asked with a cheeky smile on his face.</p><p>Rey smiles at him in amusement. He's such a typical man who craves for dominance. Ben was rough with her when they were intimate but he was the kindest man she knows. "Your breeding stock."</p><p>Ben smirks back at her in joy and wickedness. "And you know it, don't you?" he yanks on her hair.</p><p>She nods as she suppressed a smile as she saw his mouth set in a hard line. He gets so serious sometimes in bed and it's so hard not to smile at the sight. Rey couldn't help but to find it endearing even as he glared at her with such intensity.</p><p>"Good," he says. He pulls her by he hair again as he positioned himself. "You're going to get bred several more times after the little one comes out. I want our home to be filled with children. Perhaps six of them. Maybe eight. Or ten."</p><p>"Ten?" she exclaimed with a raised eyebrow. "Did I heard that correctly?" Rey couldn't help but to laugh. They want a big family but ten children crosses the line for Rey. She can't imagine them being able to afford to feed and clothe ten children. "Are you trying to build an army, my sweet husband?" she asked with quick wit.</p><p>Ben chuckled as he starts them off slowly. "Perhaps."</p><p>"I love your humor so." She leans to kiss him.</p><p>"So if we ever taken out, we should statistically have one child survive to carry my legacy."</p><p>Rey laughs again and nuzzles his throat.</p><hr/><p>The Emperor had always wanted to have one child have his name. Not his given name but the name he's chosen for himself. However with the situation he's chose for himself, that wasn't the option. His wife doesn't know his true identity and it was better that way.</p><p>Still, he wished she wasn't so fond of his given name - Ben.</p><p>His wife was drawn to naming their children variations of it for she's so in love with him. Brenna and Bennet. And now she's thinking of another name for the one on the way. There was nothing wrong with the name Ben but Ben was the name of man who died long ago. If only his wife knew of his family lineage. Oh if only his wife knew the name belonged to the dead man Ben Solo, an heir to the Skywalker legacy.</p><p>There was many things his wife doesn't know.</p><p>You may ask why he lets his wife name their children those damn names. There's so much that his wife doesn't have control over and so he decides to throw her a bone. It's the least he can do, he suppose. The names weren't as bad but they don't exactly echo a sense of respect either. It's not an issue however. In the future their children can simply change their names.</p><p>His children will be part of the Knights of Ren, just like him.</p><p>His sweet wife is going over different variations of Ben. Kylo touches her hand gently to calm her down. She's so excited coming up with names. "Sweetheart, why don't we name our child something else? There are other names."</p><p>Rey scrunches up her nose and giggles. "Yes but I'm sure I can come up with something fitting for this child. Besides it's too late to change it up. I want all of our children to have names that start with 'B.'"</p><p>Kylo chuckled. He couldn't wait to see her struggle coming up with a name when they are about to have their sixth child. "Very well sweetheart."</p><hr/><p>They finally found a place to their liking. He spends his free time working on the house and prepares it to meet his standards. The children liked their new home but were adjusting to having their own rooms. Their children were so used to sharing a bed with their mother. They let their children sleep with them from time to time but he makes sure he's firm so they understand.</p><p>The new baby is going to come soon.</p><p>Rey has been nesting for months. She's not as anxious with this pregnancy but Kylo liked to be cautious. If he could he would have her deliver with doctors and midwives present. He always offers it but she always declines. She's a stubborn thing. Truly. His desert flower is so used to being alone and doing things on her own.</p><p>He knows that letting people in terrifies her. Kylo's happy he's the exception. His desert flower was something special and a part of him is content of keeping her to himself. She doesn't need anyone else but him to take care of her.</p><p>She's given birth before - this delivery will go well. He hopes. He's always so attentive to keeping track of the days and calculating her expected date to make sure he's present. That's one of the many things he hates about being so absent due to work. Kylo doesn't want to miss anything or ever make her feel abandoned. They both feared abandonment for it happened to them.</p><p>Rey's feeding Bennet while Brenna was out picking flowers in their yard. Kylo checks up on them periodically as he fixed things up around the house. It's nice being with her and being able to use his hands. As the Emperor he was waited on hand and foot. He hates being smothered and he imagines Rey would feel the same too. Brenna comes running into their home with a bouquet of flowers with roots still attached.</p><p>Brenna's bringing in dirt but he doesn't say anything.</p><p>He just smiles at his daughter. She's showing him the flowers with pride before she runs off to give to Rey.</p><p>Kylo shakes his head in awe as he watched his daughter skip by. He doesn't think he was ever happy like that as a child. He smiles to himself to know he was capable of giving love to someone and a childhood filled with joy and safety.</p><hr/><p>There was once an Emperor before him. He was Kylo's leader. His mentor. Kylo respected the man deeply, would do anything for him. Perhaps even give his mentor his life. That all changed when his mentor found out about his desert flower. Kylo did the best he could to hide her and buried her deep in his thoughts but his mentor always searched thoroughly.</p><p>His mentor ordered him to discard of the weakness.</p><p>He said it would be Kylo's downfall.</p><p>But Kylo did not want to for once in his life he had something to himself. For himself. And so like any other man, Kylo did what anyone would do. He strangled his mentor to death before his mentor even thought of it. Perhaps he should have gone with a quicker death but in rage, his emotions got the best of him. They always do. He killed his mentor - the man who raised him when his own parents didn't want to.</p><p>Kylo thinks about this as he added garnishes to tonight's supper. Rey wasn't feel well today and so he cooked tonight. He made one of her favorite meals that she notoriously craves during pregnancy - sweet glazed root vegetables and roasted hen. Kylo doesn't regret what he did to his mentor. He loved his wife and children so and their love for him was real. Genuine. This was something not anyone could give him and that he was well aware of.</p><p>His whole life, even before conception was planned out for him. There was nothing organic about his life at all. Everything had been chosen and mapped out for him even by his mentor. His mentor even had picked out a woman for him for when Kylo was interested in settling down.</p><p>The woman he's chosen for himself did not meet to his mentor's requirements but Kylo doesn't care. For he's chosen her and this was something he's never done - have some autonomy in his life. And that had so much meaning. Kylo never thought he was capable of emotions after years of being forced to store them away and living in artificiality. His wife may be nothing to his mentor but she was something to Kylo. All his desert flower wants is a life of simplicity and before her, he's never considered that as an option for himself.</p><p>Kylo sets food on the table one by one. He's chopped up everything into tiny pieces for his children and wife and mashed up some fruit for Bennet. It was quite therapeutic, cooking for his family. He liked order and seeing the end results.</p><p>All his desert flower wants in life was a family and a home. She does not yearn for more. And yet he finds himself fulfilled with her dream of hers. A part of him wants to leave everything behind for her so he can truly be there for her every step of the way. And be the man that she sees him as. Be the man she deserves. The option was on the table. The galaxy has never seen his face. He could leave it all behind him and those problems will disappear.</p><p>He paused as he found himself sinking in those thoughts again.</p><p>This was something his mentor had warned him about. About choosing her.</p><p>That she would be the reason of his turmoil and the catalyst to his downfall.</p><hr/><p>Kylo does some things that his wife wasn't aware of. Sometimes he heals her. He does this in a discrete manner, cautious of revealing his true nature to his desert flower. He does it mainly when she's asleep and she's under the assumption of withered dried plants and weak tonics were the answer. He heals her in small dosages, especially after she gives birth.</p><p>If he was able to, he would heal her altogether whenever she gets a scrape or cut but he knows better.</p><p>His wife is not naïve, no. Not at all. Rey was intelligent of what she had to work with living in a junkyard of a planet. He admits he was manipulative and deceitful but with her, it was all in good intent.</p><p>He likes to think if his wife ever found out who he truly was, she would still love him.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. An Awakening</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Perhaps if the Emperor went with the alternative method, things would be relatively the same. The Emperor supposes. The method would have been his wife knowing his identity and taking up on his offer of being his in exchange for stability. Shelter. Food. Companionship. Kylo likes to think she would take up on the proposal for she was a woman from Jakku.</p><p>And that planet was nothing.</p><p>His thoughts orbit back and forth especially with the near arrival of their third child.</p><p>The Emperor reminds himself not to worry. She won't be delivering until a month from now. He has to put all his attention on important matters. And yet, he gets terribly homesick when he was away from her. Rey was his home and their children were the beams that support them. Kylo runs his gloved fingers along the mask that barred his face as he examined the new reports and retrieved documents.</p><p>He was not alone in his quarters. No he's never alone.</p><p>As the Emperor he was guarded at all times by the esteemed red guards. The color of the armor of the red guards brings some color at least to the dreary black chrome place. The red guards are silent unless they are being spoken to. He can tell that the red guards were observing his exterior. They can sense his mind being elsewhere.</p><p>Kylo shields his mind with more intensity. He taps his fingers on the control panel to study the new location he plans to invade.</p><p>Something in the Force breaks.</p><p>The Emperor was aware of the disturbance.</p><p>Kylo looked up from the screen and scanned his surroundings. The guards were frozen in place - as if time had stopped. Kylo blinked and reached for his lightsaber as he moved around the room. He was being watched. He can feel it, someone's gaze.</p><p>"Come out," he ordered. "There's no use in hiding." There was no one else in the quarters he was in but he knows that there <em>has</em> to be. He can feel it in his bones. He's never been so certain in his life. The vision of his surroundings fade before him and another image appears before him. Of Rey, sitting in their new den. She's staring at him in shock, clinging on to the linen dishcloth. Kylo lowered his lightsaber in bewilderment. She's not physically here - and yet he sees her.</p><p>Was he simply imagining this?</p><p>Rey tilted her head at him - as if to let him know she was receptive - that this was happening in the present. "Hello?" she said in a quiet whisper. There's hesitation in her voice. She knows very well how the Emperor looked. All dressed in black with a mask.</p><p>Kylo clutched on to his lightsaber. How was this possible? Was this something she was able to do all this time? No. He would have sensed the Force within her sooner. This, this was new. "Who are you girl?" he asked in a tone that his wife doesn't recognize.</p><p>His wife doesn't answer. He can tell she was still in disbelief, unsure of what was happening.</p><p>"How are you doing this?" he asked her then. The Emperor wanted to see how much his wife knew.</p><p>Rey blinked. "I don't...I don't know. It just happened on it's own."</p><p>'"This is a Force Bond," he informs her. Kylo finds tenderness in his voice. Even when he's wearing a mask, he's unable to stop being compassionate with his wife. She doesn't even know who he is. She's looking at him like a frightened little girl. "This hasn't happened in centuries. I thought this ability was a myth. The Force is connecting us."</p><p>She dug her fingers into the linen cloth, unable to register his words. "Why would the Force do that?"</p><p>The Emperor peered through and studied her surroundings and his. He takes a step forward to her space, slowly breaking the thin barriers. Interesting. It almost feels like he's able to grab her. Rey trembled and moved back. "I don't know but isn't this a lovely thing?" The Emperor asked his desert flower.</p><p>Rey's background faded before his eyes. The only thing he could see was her, just her. "No," she said with such conviction and disdain.</p><p>The connection ends abruptly and Kylo is left alone. He blinked several times, to clarify to himself that she was really gone. She seems more in tune to the Force bond than what he initially believed. This won't be the only time. This simply was just the beginning. Kylo knows his wife. She could never leave well enough alone. It wasn't in her nature. She was a curious being.</p><p>The Red Guards emerged before him. "Is there anything wrong?" one asked.</p><p>"No," the Emperor responded calmly. He gathered himself as he turned to face his guards. This will impose an issue on their living arrangement. "Not at all."</p>
<hr/><p>All through the week, Kylo remain cautious with taking off his mask. He senses her every now and then, sensing her experimenting with the bond. His wife looms in and out, like stitch work. She's not very subtle about it but then again this was all new. It was rather amusing, seeing her test the limits and capabilities of their bond. Such a sweet desert flower. It was evident that this was all new to her by the facial expressions she makes. She always had such an expressive face and he liked that about her. All her thoughts were transparent on her face.</p><p>He feels her presence as he's tending a wound. He blocks this action from her. Kylo was learning so much about this bond, it was rather fascinating. He's figured how to block certain things from her during their Force connections - from surroundings to bruises on flesh. And she had learned this as well. He shields his face the way she shields her pregnant belly. It was surprising, seeing how fast she picked up on things. "So tell me girl, tell me about yourself," he said.</p><p>Rey doesn't respond. Stubborn thing.</p><p>"I assume you know who I am," The Emperor presses on, agitating her.</p><p>"I do," his desert flower responds firmly, unable to hide her animosity.</p><p>Kylo smirked underneath his mask. "You despise me and yet you come back."</p><p>His desert flower's mouth parted slightly but nothing came out. She doesn't know what to say.</p><p>"There's something magnetic about this connection," he speaks the thing in her mind that she refuses to acknowledge to him. "We can communicate with one another despite being in different planets - can see one another's surroundings - even touch things from other places. It's rather addicting, isn't it?"</p><p>His wife doesn't answer but no response was still a response.</p><p>Kylo took another step closer to her. She has yet to learn how to block his access to do so. A part of him wanted to grab her little body and snatch her. "Tell me girl, what is your name?"</p><p>"Why does it matter to you?" Rey snapped back with furrowed eyebrows. Such intensity from her. Always. Kylo smirked again. His sweet desert flower. Even witnessing her have hatred for the Emperor, Kylo couldn't help but to find endearing.</p><p>"I want to know the name of the person I share this connection with."</p><p>He hears Bennet cry in the background.</p><p>And just like that, their Force connection is gone.</p>
<hr/><p>His wife tries connecting with him purposely during inopportune times. She's such a cunning thing, so determined to see him unmasked. Kylo would never let that happen. It would break her. "You despise me and yet you still gravitate towards me."</p><p>"I don't know why," Rey said in a low voice. She's presenting herself with a flat stomach. She's done this before but it bothers every time he sees it. He knows why she was doing that. She was trying to protect their child from the Emperor. The sight makes his mind think the baby is lost for a split second that feels like an eternity. "You frightened me -</p><p>"And yet?" he asked, tilting his head at her. She's only showing herself to him. Nothing else. Oh how he would love to see their children. Kylo misses them so. At least with this bond, he doesn't feel as lonely. He enjoys speaking to her even if he has to pretend to be a stranger. He likes toying with his desert flower. Intimidating her was rather amusing.</p><p>"There's something familiar about you."</p><p>"I see," Kylo said indifferently.</p><p>"It doesn't make any sense since I've never met you in my life - we've never crossed paths."</p><p>"The Force is beyond anyone. It choses paths and we are meant to follow. It's evident by your face you think I'm going to kill you."</p><p>"Are you?"</p><p>"No," The Emperor chuckled. "There's so much to this bond that I have yet to learn. You're an importance to me...for now." He watches his wife tremble before him. He expected her to lash out, to reply with fierceness.</p><p>"I know I should stop triggering this for my safety but I can't help it."</p><p>The Emperor nods. "So do I. There is something about this bond. It's tantalizing. But I can sense you are untrained. There's so much raw power in you. I can show you so much more of the Force if you let me."</p><p>Rey shakes her head at his offer. "I don't want to be like you."</p><p>"There's nothing to be scared of." He would never hurt her. She was his desert flower. "I can teach you. And in exchange you'll be by my side."</p><p>His wife breaks the bond then.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. The Gentle Man</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Maybe this was all a dream.</p><p>Rey was in her final trimester and she tends not to sleep from the discomfort if it all. But if it was a dream, it kept reoccurring. A little too much. It was all unbelievable. She had always been no one and she's grown fond of that title. It's impossible for Rey to be Force sensitive for she's never been her whole life - but then she remembers the stories of Luke Skywalker.</p><p>Luke Skywalker was just a young boy when he became aware of his abilities. It had always been there but it taken years for him to recognize the Force.</p><p>She doesn't want any of this though. She was content with her place for she knew the life of the Jedi was lonely. In all the stories there was never a Jedi that was given a happy ending. Jedis were given tragic tales of loss and death. And yet, she keeps playing with her abilities. There was something electrifying about it - a jolt of life every time she connects with the monster. When she uses the Force she feels something beyond herself. More.</p><p>Perhaps this was all of the Emperor's doing. He was powerful and skilled while Rey was none of that. She was just a mother and wife. She's nothing like him. But if this was all of his doing why would he want her? Rey had no use let alone a role in his story. They were completely parallel even with their first meeting. There was so much that Rey doesn't understand.</p><p>She should be focusing on important matters. Her children were her main priority and if she keeps experimenting it might put her children in danger. That was the last thing she wanted. Rey sat on her bed and stared at her two children curled beside her. She touched her stomach and thought of her husband. She sighed, unable to stop herself from being lonely.</p><p>She really wished he was here right now.</p><hr/><p>"I expected if I was ever in the presence of the Emperor, that you would order me to bow before you," Rey says.</p><p>The Emperor chuckled in a condescending manner. "I don't need to order anyone. It's expected, a common courtesy. Clearly something you don't have."</p><p>Rey ignored his snide remark and examined his face. All she could see was the cold metal of his mask. There was something off about it - artificial - a projection she realized. His face must be bare but he's hiding it from her for obvious reasons. "Then why don't you tell me to kneel before you?" she countered with agitation in her voice.</p><p>"Do you want my permission? Is that what you're looking for?" he mused.</p><p>"No," Rey said quickly. Her cheeks flushed then in embarrassment.</p><p>"Besides it would be cruel of me to force a heavily pregnant woman to bow."</p><p>Rey went still.</p><p>"Our first bond, your protruding stomach was visible. This was before you learned how to create illusions and block your surroundings."</p><p>Oh. How could have she forgotten that? And yet Rey continues to hold on to the illusion she was projecting before him - of a flat stomach. It was rather useless since he was aware of the child she was hiding - and yet she still wants protects her child. She knows what she was doing was dangerous. She can sense him trying to decipher her exact location. She can see it in his body language - his interest in finding her and keeping her locked up so he could explore his abilities with her. Rey's a fool, she knows that. But whenever she connects with him she feels more.</p><p>"Despite all your precognitions about me, I'm not a cruel man."</p><p>She looked up, her eyes flickering at the slit of the mask where his eyes should be. He feels familiar. As much as she hate to admit to herself, he's nothing like what she expected him to be. He was rather articulate and polite but she feels it - the anger and recklessness under his façade that flows in bones. As charming as he was, he was a frightening man. There was something unsettling about speaking to someone without a face. He gets to see her while she doesn't. She felt as if she was exposed to him and that he knows every single thing about her.</p><p>"Are you expecting soon?" The Emperor asked with curiosity in his voice.</p><p>"Yes and the father is present," she adds. Rey flinches then, unable to hide her shyness. It was a rather foolish thing to say but it was rather transparent he was attracted to her. He speaks to her with underlying flirtatiousness and seems to always gravitate closer to her.</p><p>The Emperor laughs then.</p><p>Rey doesn't say a word. She hates how he treats her, like a predator with its prey. Perhaps he isn't in the wrong since she was just nothing to a man of his status. She should be so lucky she wasn't murdered by his bare hands. He wouldn't harm a pregnant woman or any woman for that matter. But she's not sure if he would spare a father.</p><p>The Emperor seems like a man to murder his own father for political gain.</p><p>"I'm not surprised," he begins again. "You're a beautiful woman."</p><p>Rey shifted her gaze at the dark corner of the room in his space. The Emperor was never hesitant with making advances at her. She know she should severe this bond for her family's safety but there was something about him that she found soothing. Familiar.</p><hr/><p>Ever since they started their Force bonds, Kylo's been plagued by a wicked desire of raping his own wife. He likes seeing her react to him when he's the Emperor. She's such a frightened little girl with big eyes. She doesn't look at him the same when he's Ben. She looks at the Emperor in such a submissive and docile manner. He wonders if she would recognize his touch under this disguise. She would, he likes to think - but it would take her a while after the shock of being violated.</p><p>She would attempt to pry away from him and cry.</p><p>His desert flower makes such beautiful sounds but Kylo wonders how she'll sound when she's terrified. He would love to overpower her and hurt her little wrists. And she will yell and scream. She'll curse him out and try to fight him but it will be no use. He was a large man and she his precious flower. The Emperor would tell her it was no use to plead for she's already done this with him countless times and gave birth to his children.</p><p>Oh his desert flower will hate him but he found such arousal from those strong emotions of hers. She's stuck with him, for better and for worse. Kylo imagines himself raping her multiple times, allowing himself to be as monstrous and vile as he wants to be.</p><p>It was rather hazardous for him to connect to her when he's the Emperor for he's slowly becoming comfortable being his true self around his wife.</p><p>The Emperor was a dark man.</p><hr/><p>Kylo thinks about his children, like all good fathers do. He misses them terribly and wishes she would show him them. Rey was cautious, always had been. "Is this your first child?" he asked her, pointing at the bump she was hiding from him. A part of him deeply enjoys pretending to be a stranger and relearning things about his wife.</p><p>The Emperor always had such a twisted sense of humor.</p><p>Rey doesn't answer. She's such a stubborn fiery thing. She has yet to reveal her name to the Emperor. Oh how Kylo would love to teach her a lesson in respect. He always expected her to be obedient if she was ever in the Emperor's presence. No instead she's a little defiant. Kylo couldn't blame her especially when she comes from a filthy planet.</p><hr/><p>"What are we?" his desert flower asked him. She's wearing a long dress today, the one he got her last summer. She looks exhausted. The baby's almost there and then she can rest.</p><p>"I believe we are a dyad."</p><p>Rey raised her eyebrow at him. "A dyad?" she asked slowly.</p><p>The Emperor nods with patience. "A dyad. Two that are one," he said, concealing the fondness in his tone. How strange fate was. He found her before he even knew what she truly was. His other half. In marriage and with the Force. "A strong and powerful bond. A dyad hasn't been seen in centuries."</p><p>Rey blinked quietly as she absorbed the information he was giving to her. She's chewing on her nails. If he was Ben he would tell her to stop. It was a nasty habit of hers that she did whenever she was trying to register things. "And this thing that we are...does this have a use for you?"</p><p>Kylo nods. "It certainly does."</p><p>She doesn't seem to quite understand the weight of what they were. Or the importance of it.</p><p>Perhaps it was better this way.</p><hr/><p>The Emperor senses her whenever she's holding back. She's captivated by him at times but choses to hide it for she was a married woman. She was loyal and this was something he loved about her. He sees it in her face with how drawn to him with the way he carries himself and speaks. She was also a proud woman, who refuses to admit any attraction for someone she hates with a passion. This revelation eases him to know that whatever person she met, she would love him just the same.</p><p>There was something about their dynamic when he's the Emperor. There was such an intensity when they were around each other - something that they don't have when he's Ben. Longing gazes. Fixated body language. Nervous and timid behavior from his wife. She was so alluring when she's shy with him, she's never like this when he's Ben. Kylo wonders if sex would be different with him being his true self instead of the idealized polished version.</p><p>As the Emperor he doesn't have to hold back. He can as feral as he wants with her because she expects that from a man like him. Ben was gentle. Ben was caring. And sometimes Kylo doesn't want to be that man. He dreams about raping her more and more with each passing day. She would hate it but he likes to think she'll learn to crave it.</p><p>The energy between them was beyond anything he's ever experienced.</p><p>Perhaps she feels the same too.</p><hr/><p>Kylo recalls the first time he took his wife. This was only a few years ago. She was only eighteen and eager to lay in bed with him. He wanted to take her sooner but she was a traditional girl and insisted they waited until marriage. Kylo honored her wishes and married her fast. She was glowing that night, so giddy and happy. And so was he for it was the first time he was with a woman so willing to be taken by him.</p><p>There was no fear in her even as the small cracks of his true personality peaked through their consummation. Rey found the darkness endearing the way he found her trusting naïve nature mesmerizing.</p><p>He knew from the beginning this girl was special.</p><p>If only he knew where life would lead them years from now.</p><p>It all made sense though from the love at first sight to instant connection. Perhaps he always knew there was something in her but for the first couple of years he wanted to give her the life she always wanted. It was coincidental how everything in their relationship - with either identity - Ben or Kylo, was all made up of illusions.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. For Better, For Worse</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>tags have been updated ~</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>His wife wasn't feeling well.</p><p>The baby was coming soon. Kylo watched as she was sitting on the bed. She's speaking to him through another Force bond. Ever so often, she would touch her stomach to alleviate the pain. She doesn't address it but she doesn't need to. The discomfort was clear on her face. She tries to contain her emotions but it was near impossible. Every action of hers was involuntary. She keeps adjusting herself to ease the tensions in her body. This particular pregnancy has been rough with her for some reason. She didn't have this much trouble with the other two.</p><p>Kylo pulls off his leather glove and slowly moved his hand to her. It was in his nature to tend to her whenever he senses her in distress. The Emperor loves his wife so even when she's being disobedient. She doesn't know that's why and so he's lenient with her.</p><p>Rey shifts back and frantically shakes her head at him.</p><p>The Emperor was relentless and intrudes her space. She lets him. Not out of want but curiosity of the bond that ties them. What limits were there? Was there any? He feels it, his fingers ripping through the thin barrier and breaking the illusion she was projecting. He can feel it, her heart racing. Her eyes are large but she's still, too entranced to reject him. Kylo gently placed his fingertips on her stomach.</p><p>"Go bac-k," she stammered. "Please."</p><p>She sounds so desperate to convince him she doesn't want him. Kylo shakes his head and moves his fingers to touch hers. Rey jolts then, like electricity running through her veins. And that's what it was. A raw energy that's unknown. This was only the surface. There was so much for them to explore. Kylo latches on to her tighter. She's hesitant and shakes her head. He remains assertive. Within seconds, her little fingers curls against his. Her eyes widened from the action. Perhaps in recognition. Or perhaps in realization she feels more. More for the man he truly was. "It's amazing, isn't it?" he asked her. He's here, not just his hand but his entire body. In their room. She feels real. Tangible.</p><p>He places his hands on her worn shoulders to knead the knots away. The wicked thoughts in his mind go wild again. He could rape her right now. And perhaps make her go into an early labor. His eyes darkened at the thought. His sweet desert flower is so helpless. Of course if that situation should happen he'll take care of her and the baby first and then assault her. It's funny seeing things unravel. For years he sought for consensual sex from a willing partner. He didn't think he'll ever miss the way things were before.</p><p>Rey moved away from him. "I know you want more from me. I can't. I'm a happily married woman."</p><p>The Emperor shakes his head at her. "Forget your husband. Just let the memories of him die."</p><p>"Are you threatening to kill him?" she senses the bitterness in his tone. He has immense disdain for her husband, Rey thought.</p><p>"Perhaps."</p><p>His wife breaks the bond then. Kylo smirks underneath his mask as he put back on his glove. He knows very well his touch was lingering. He knows his sweet little wife will be up all night thinking of his touch in confusion. If she had not end the bond, he would have told her not to fret for he will come for her soon.</p><p>The Emperor wonders if she plans to tell Ben about her discovery. About her little spiritual affair. He knows his wife and knows she will. She's an obedient wife, honest and loyal. He imagines her telling him the day after his return. She's such a kind wife, would want him to settle down first. And yet, Kylo was left unsatisfied with the scenario running in his mind.</p><p>He doesn't want to go back to pretending to be that man any longer.</p><p>And perhaps he won't.</p>
<hr/><p>"Do you ever take off your mask?"</p><p>Kylo laughed at his wife's foolish question. "Yes, I do," he says as if he was answering a child.</p><p>"I'm just wondering since I was randomly thinking about Mandalorians today."</p><p>"Telling stories to your little one already I see," he mused. Brenna's always entranced by tales of warriors and knights. He imagines his daughter contently listening as she drank her afternoon milk in her favorite metal cup. And Bennet, he would be bundled in Rey's arms and cooing. The Emperor misses his children so.</p><p>"No," Rey said immediately. She says this with flared nostrils and furrowed eyebrows as an attempt to appear tough. "It's just a question that's been on my mind. I've never seen you without it."</p><p>The Emperor took a step closer to his wife. He eyed her, at the apron she was wearing over her clothes. Her pregnant belly and swollen breasts looked more prominent. Her stomach was visible - she's no longer hiding the bump of hers. Perhaps she was too worn out to do so. "Why are you so fascinated with me girl?"</p><p>"I'm not - that's how I am."</p><p>"Yes," he said in a condescending manner. "You don't know how to leave well enough alone." He's expected his wife to stop talking to the Emperor for her safety but she doesn't. She's such a naïve girl. If it was another person and not him, she could have put herself and their family in danger. He's rather disappointed in her.</p><p>"I don't," she doesn't even deny the fact. She interlocks her hands the way a child does in the presence of an instructor.</p><p>"You would love living with me. My place is much grander than your little home."</p><p>"You've only seen bits of it," she defended. The Emperor has only seen parts of the kitchen and bedroom. "It's more than little. It's quaint and cozy."</p><p>Kylo chuckles at her. He knows. He knows. "You deserve a much better life than to be a wife of a simple man."</p><p>"I'm perfectly happy with the way things are," Rey says with utter complete confidence. Feisty thing.</p><p>"I see," he exhaled. It's rather funny seeing how things unravel. For it was not too long ago that he was satisfied with the life he was giving to his children. A life of humbleness. Simplicity. This was what he always wanted and achieved and yet his opinions change in the matter of weeks.</p><p>Perhaps this was why the Force was connecting them and bonding them, for him to see the error of his ways. He sees things in another light. Another direction.</p>
<hr/><p>Rey waits for husband to return. She has prepared for his return in advance, eager to be reunited with him. She already went to the market and cleaned. Supper is already prepared but she's letting it simmer in the pot so the flavors can be more pronounced. Her children were already bathed and dressed. Rey already applied oils on her body and taken her tea and supplements.</p><p>She waits like a young child waiting for her parents. Except this time was different because Ben always returns while her parents never did. It's a bittersweet revelation - a thing that Rey tries not to think about too much for it makes her sad. Her children are playing by her feet while she relaxed on the couch. She's heavily pregnant and can barely move.</p><p>This pregnancy has been the most difficult for her for some reason. She thought the first would be the most difficult with it being the first experience to something new.</p><p>Rey waits for her husband to return.</p><p>He's usually here by now.</p><p>She tries not to dwell on the time.</p>
<hr/><p>Rey tries not to worry or be absorbed in the passage of time but then Brenna and Bennet get restless. And with that, was another reminder of the time. It's midnight and her husband was supposed to be here by four. She exhaled as she attempted to get up from the couch. She struggles for a few minutes. Luckily her children are big enough to jump into her arms. She's been struggling to bend down as well.</p><p>She puts them to bed. She doesn't usually have a hard time with this task but her children are upset for they expected to see their father first. It takes her a much longer time to get them to fall asleep. Rey returns to the den afterwards but to her dismay, her husband still wasn't there.</p><p>She shakes the dark thoughts away. No. He's going to come back. He always does. He's tall and strong. Nothing bad happened to him.</p><p>He's not her parents. He's going to return for her and their children. Ben loves them.</p><p>She sets herself back into the couch with blankets and pillows. It's late and she's tired but she will wait for him.</p><p>She always does.</p>
<hr/><p>Children cry. And children cry louder when their mothers are in despair. Rey learns this as she is woken up to her water breaking. She's numb, trying to register what was happening. She couldn't be in labor - she usually has contractions for a while first. She wasn't suppose to go into labor until two weeks later. Ben's not here and she's going to have the baby now. It takes her a while to get up from the couch. She staggers to the room to tend to her children.</p><p>She's alone. She has no choice but to take care of everything. She can't leave them on their own. Rey winced and holds on to the table. She frowned as her heart dropped. She's so far away from the room. Children cry though even when it was inconvenient. She feels so helpless.</p><p>Rey found herself leaning to the ground. She's in so much pain.</p><p>Her children are crying for her. She can hear Brenna trying to open the door. Twisting sounds. Frantic yelling. Rey wished she didn't close the door tonight but she couldn't have known this would happen. Rey took a deep breath and continues to go to them.</p>
<hr/><p>The Emperor sees true horror in his wife's eyes as he entered their house. He's dressed all in black with a mask. His wife is on the ground, breathing heavily. She's in labor. She's not supposed to be until another few weeks. The children are latched on to her, trying to comfort her. As if their children could do anything. They're young, they can't possibly comprehend what was happening. The children start to cry at the sight of him, of the man in the mask. He snatches them by the collar of their clothes and takes them to the other room.</p><p>They will be in the way trying to protect their mother and so he has to set them aside like animals. His children can live a few hours without their parents. His children kick and scream, desperately trying to break free from his grasp. He laughs at the sight. His children usually never want him to let go when he holds them.</p><p>"Please don't hurt them," Rey exclaimed as she winced.</p><p>He shuts the door and locks it so Brenna can't open it. "Pace your breathing," he orders her in a soft tone. He lifts his hand in the air and just like that all the doors close in the house and all the windows open for fresh air. The location of their home was spaced out from others. No one will hear a single thing.</p><p>She looks absolutely frightened. Just like he had imagined. He likes the sight of it. She looks ravishing even as she's covered in sweat and tears. She's so frail. So vulnerable. He's going to rape her once their newborn is delivered. He's fantasized about it so much that he has to do it. "You look at me as if I'm an intruder. You know that's not the case."</p><p>"You let yourself in!" she seethed. She's wincing again. The Emperor stares at her, at his precious desert flower. She's in excruciating pain. That's what she gets for always refusing to get help. Such a stubborn thing. The next child he's going to have doctors and midwives present. He loves his precious desert flower so, his beautiful breeding stock. "You broke in! You broke the lock on the door -</p><p>He shakes his head at her response. He kneels down on the floor and grabs her by her chin. She claws at him but he remained the dominant one. She's such a weak girl with powers unrealized. The Emperor has so much to take care of. Their children. A newborn. His wife. And now be her teacher. His work was never done. "You've simply let me in," he taunted her.</p><p>His wife stops fighting altogether.</p><p>"What do you call weeks of you speaking to me and showing me selected parts of your home?" he asked in a mocking tone. "I call that an invitation."</p><p>Rey became silent. The Emperor smiles crookedly underneath his mask. He watches her expression change before him of revelation of her foolish actions. She should be lucky it was with him and not someone else. She ignorantly showed a stranger snippets of her location. She didn't think of the repercussions of it. The sounds of their children crying shakes her out of her guilt. "Please," she begged. "Don't hurt them and please let me be. I'm bringing another child into the world right now. Please I beg of you."</p><p>"Let me help you," he insisted. His statement was more of a command.</p><p>She goes quiet as his hands roamed her body. She's so blind. She doesn't recognize the touch of her husband. Kylo's not angry but instead aroused. He'll get to live his fantasy of being the stranger that rapes this defenseless woman. He can't wait to hear her screams and cries. He leaves her be for a moment to "search" for the tub and fill it with warm water. He knows how to play the part well. She's so unexpecting of his true identity.</p><p>He digs into her thoughts and he smiles underneath the mask. She knows what's going to happen after the baby comes. She's thinking the worst of him that he possibly murdered her husband and that's why he wasn't here. Perhaps he did.</p><p>For the decision he's made...there's no going back. They'll never have the picture perfect life again - the life that Rey had always wanted for herself and their family. Things will never be the same again. And Kylo doesn't mind. He's had a few years to experience true love from her and now he wants her hatred and fear. She'll learn to love him again with time. He continues to search her thoughts as the time comes to lift her and place her in the tub. She's compliant for she has no other choice but to obey him for she needs him at this very moment. She's in labor and alone with him while their children were crying in the other room.</p><p>She shivers as he strips the last of her clothing. Immediately she hugs her breasts from him. He smirked. If only she knows he's already seen her and touched her countless times. "What did you do to my husband?" she asked in a low tone. "Where is he?"</p><p>The Emperor doesn't answer. She'll find out soon enough but for now he wants her to believe he's another man so he can have his sweet little fantasy. He strokes her damp hair with his gloved hand to silence her again. "One...two..." he starts counting for her to stop talking. "Three."</p><p>And just like that, it was quiet.</p><p>It would have been dead silence if their children would simply stop crying from the other room. He can't blame them though. His children were scared and didn't know what was happening. At least his children were young enough not to remember. They won't be traumatized and he's thankful for that. This life will be a thing of the past soon and all will be forgotten for their children.</p><p>"Good," The Emperor said as his hands slipped to grasp her bare shoulders. "Tell me, do you have a name lined up for this one?"</p><p>It takes some time for Rey to pull herself out of shock and process his question. "No. My hus-band and I haven't decided y-yet," she bit her lip as she broke into tears. Her lips are quivering as her body was curling from the pain. Oh if only the baby came later. It would have been so amusing to see her try to fight him off. He would love to be the one to trigger an early delivery.</p><p>"I have some names in mind."</p><p>Rey cries harder. Her husband Ben really was dead and gone. If he was here, he would be kissing her and praising her during the delivery like he always does. Kylo couldn't do that with a mask on. He doesn't want to show her his face until he rapes her. It might be a while too. He's warming up to the thought of raping her for a couple of days straight before revealing himself to her. The Emperor rubs her back to calm her as their children cried from the other room.</p>
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